After reading
this brilliant entry, I decided to grade Bush the same way our children are graded. Turns out, he's not a very good sudent.
Full size report card and letter to his parents below the fold...
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Bush,
Your son, George, is having some problems at school. He has consistently performed below the other students and his absences have become a serious problem. At first, the other kids liked him and he seemed to have a large circle of playmates during recess, but he has been slowly pulling himself away from everyone but his closest friends (and, as we've discussed, those friends aren't the best influence on him).
Lately, it has come to my attention that he has been deliberately breaking the rules behind my back. Some of his closest friends have already been suspended or expelled. If George's behavior doesn't improve soon, I'm afraid the school will have to take serious disciplinary action.
Please call me so we can discuss your son's future. It may be in the best interest of the class if he were moved to a new school where his actions can be dealt with effectively. I will help in any way I can to get George back on the right track.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Liberty